We are all looking for someone.
For some of us, we desire a romantic partner who will remain safe, constant, and loving.
Or perhaps we desire business partnerships who are helpful, inspiring, and help us carry the load.
We may be looking for new friendships, support or networking groups. New clients, mentors or work colleagues.
No matter who or what you are looking for, it will help you find the right person (or people) if you are clear on what you’re looking to find.
When you’re on the search for someone to provide you something that you cannot provide yourself, this is a very special and unique role; it’s important they understand you and your needs.Sheena Jeffers, MSEd, Wellness
Not everyone will be qualified for the job. You need a way to decipher if someone is ready and willing for the role. The only way to determine if they are the appropriate person (or group) for the care and growth of your soul is to observe from them certain qualities and behaviors.
Here is my suggested list of observable qualities and behaviors:
- They have a lifelong obsession with… What are they radically excited by? Is this something you can respect or share with them?
- They prioritize… What do you observe them making a priority of? Cleanliness? Finances? Career? Family? Is this something you also prioritize or can at least get behind?
- They approach life and others with… This is the good ole “How did they treat the server at the restaurant?” idea. You want to observe how they move through the world and how they see and treat human life.
- When I am around them I feel… How do they make you feel? Where does the flow of energy go when you’re around them (into you or out of you?) Do you feel safe? Supported? Heard? Seen?
- They honor in me… This one is so important. If they are honoring something about you, it’s because a) they see the real you b) they respect the real you.
- They are constantly and consistently showing me… Decide right now what you need to see and feel on a consistent basis to feel truly loved, respected, safe, seen and heard.
- They possess, embody and live the following… How do you see them running and designing their own lives? Do they expect you to do that for them or are they emotionally, financially, physically, spiritually running their own lives? How do you feel about how they are running their lives / organization?
- They are on a constant quest for… What are they always striving for, looking for, desiring? Is this something they can find without you uprooting your entire life for them?
- They think and talk mostly about… Observe what is on their heart and mind. Is this something that’s important to you? Healthy for you?
You can download the Partner Manifesto here.
You want this person – or even future person – to be in alignment with who you are and how you live. They can only best partner you if they understand and respect you.
This manifesto is intended for your use to ensure they are a safe person for you and the life you are living. If you are uncomfortable with something that comes out on this list – perhaps it’s something you observed or noticed – then this is something for you to think on. They may not be aligned with who you want to be, and it’s OK to pass on them.
You want people in your life who adore you in such a way that you’re able to grow and feel safe, heard and seen. You’re able to thrive not because of them but because of the supportive, respectful environment they create by being in your life.
Reminder: you are worthy of people in your life who align with who you are, what you believe and how you want to live.
Sheena Jeffers, MSEd, is a Wellness Lifestyle Coach helping clients design balance, boundaries and sustainable methods of flourish for their daily lives. Schedule a session with Sheena today and watch your life change!